Thursday, April 1, 2010

On Bullies.

My heart goes out to the parents in Massachusetts that have lost a child to suicide because she was bullied. Yes, I think bullies are much worse now than when I was in school. There is so much more technology with cell phones, Facebook, and MySpace, even the comments of a blog left by anonymous people. People lose any fear of saying something truly ugly because they can post it somewhere, whether it is a text message (unlike the notes that were passed around in my high school days), or posting an ugly comment on a social network (unlike a public wall like when I was in school), there is just too much, and it gets to people all over the world. Sadly, being a bully has stuck around for some people. There are women in their 30s and late 20s that don't know how to behave. I see this bad behavior not just on the reality TV shows that I like to watch, but with women that I have been in contact with, even called them my friends, which I use the term loosely now. I have learned that true friends don't talk about me, and don't say ugly things about me behind my back.

When I posted about the Golden Rule, I meant that we need to treat others the way we want to be treated, not that you can be mean because they were being mean. The bullying shouldn't be all blamed on the media, or television shows, movies, or books. I think that many parents need to take a step back and notice the behavior their kids are seeing. A lot of bad behavior is learned by example. If you like to gossip, there's a good chance that your child could pick-up this bad behavior from you. If you judge people because they don't do exactly what you are used to, there is a good chance that your child can learn that bad behavior too. If you leave a mess in a public restroom, at a restaurant or even at the grocery store, because "they have someone for that," your child could learn that impolite bad behavior too. If you have something ugly to say about someone wearing an outfit that was bought at a discount store, your child could have that same opinion, and possibly hurt someone else with that bad behavior too.

I also compared The Golden Rule to Karma. I really do believe that what comes around goes around. If you put out a bunch of negative energy, that will come right back to you, just like when you put out more positive energy, that will come back to you too. Please, everyone just be nice! Also, encourage your children to be nice, and please make sure your kid is comfortable telling you if they feel bullied by someone. You need to ensure that your child feels safe going to school, church, and going anywhere they may go that is an extra curricular activity.

Before dropping my kids off to school I always give one last instruction before I see them again, "Be sweet!" That is something we can all do in our daily lives, just be sweet.